Season closer or eye opener?
The situation may be the same, but I, however, am not.
Was I sad this season abruptly came to a close? Of course. Was I mad my three seasons here have all ended in penalty kicks (two of those seasons against Wartburg)? Duh. And was I upset that it could quite possibly be that the better team, yet again, did not come out on top? Yes. However, this year was different.
In years’ past, I would call my parents hysterically crying with confusion, post-season identity issues (Who would I be without soccer for the next several months!?), and pain. I would sit on the phone and express my solemn, remorse, and angst to go back in time, make one more pass, and shoot one more ball. But this year, despite the situation being the same, I am not.
I love being on the soccer field more than anything- the crisp fall air brushing against my face as my heart pounds to the beat of my running feet, the ball gliding across the slick, wet grass as teammates command its behavior, the stadium lights illuminating the sweat dripping down the faces of my determined and driven peers- there isn’t anything quite like the magic of a motivated girl and a ball at her feet. However, throughout this season I have come to realize that while soccer is a huge aspect of my life, it is not my entire existence.
I learned that my identity should not be in a game that I will one day retire from. I came to realize that while soccer has brought me some of my greatest friendships, learning opportunities, and “tests,” it is not the game that molded me into the person I am today, but how I handled those situations and their existence. I learned that while soccer may surround my whole life, my whole life is not soccer.
The heartbreak still sucked, the tears still existed, and the confusion was still present, but the perspective I took after our latest defeat is one not matched by the years prior.
Before, I would excessively try to improve in the gym and on the field to come back next year and beat the mighty Knights or crush the Dutch. But this year, I am not dedicating my time in the gym to simply win a soccer game, I am doing it because by being resilient in this one situation, falling down and getting back up stronger than ever, and never ever letting defeat win is a life lesson I can use for years and years to come. Didn’t score my dream job? Cool, I’ll work harder to get the next one. Struggling to make rent? That’s okay, I’ll get another job. Resilience, though it does apply to soccer, is also an aspect I can take with me post-graduation.
Maybe I’ve matured or maybe I’ve just come to realize that my days on the field are quickly dwindling and my life ahead will no longer encapsulate a game I’ve never known life to be without, but either way, a new and greater perspective has helped ease the pain.
While I used to depict the lessons soccer has taught me as ones that would make me a stronger player, I now see those same lessons as areas of growth as a person.
While I used to work hard for the sole purpose of improving and winning, I now recognize that working hard is a trait valuable in all facets of my existence and that even life’s “scoreboard” doesn’t always represent the work put in.
While I used to be passionate and driven for outcome purposes, I now realize that being passionate and driven is the only way I should ever do any task in my life (and not for the result or reward, but for the love I truly have for what I am doing).
Sure, I knew these things before, but did I live them? No. The person I am and the growth I make as a human in these four years of college are much more important and valuable than any soccer player I could ever become and that, my friend, is thousands and thousands of dollars on higher education well-spent.
Although losing sucks and defeat is never easy, the lessons I have learned are ones that will stick with me throughout life, not just until our season-opener next fall.
So, the situation may be the same, but I, however, am not.
Was I sad this season abruptly came to a close? Of course. Was I mad my three seasons here have all ended in penalty kicks (two of those seasons against Wartburg)? Duh. And was I upset that it could quite possibly be that the better team, yet again, did not come out on top? Yes. However, this year was different.
In years’ past, I would call my parents hysterically crying with confusion, post-season identity issues (Who would I be without soccer for the next several months!?), and pain. I would sit on the phone and express my solemn, remorse, and angst to go back in time, make one more pass, and shoot one more ball. But this year, despite the situation being the same, I am not.
I love being on the soccer field more than anything- the crisp fall air brushing against my face as my heart pounds to the beat of my running feet, the ball gliding across the slick, wet grass as teammates command its behavior, the stadium lights illuminating the sweat dripping down the faces of my determined and driven peers- there isn’t anything quite like the magic of a motivated girl and a ball at her feet. However, throughout this season I have come to realize that while soccer is a huge aspect of my life, it is not my entire existence.
I learned that my identity should not be in a game that I will one day retire from. I came to realize that while soccer has brought me some of my greatest friendships, learning opportunities, and “tests,” it is not the game that molded me into the person I am today, but how I handled those situations and their existence. I learned that while soccer may surround my whole life, my whole life is not soccer.
The heartbreak still sucked, the tears still existed, and the confusion was still present, but the perspective I took after our latest defeat is one not matched by the years prior.
Before, I would excessively try to improve in the gym and on the field to come back next year and beat the mighty Knights or crush the Dutch. But this year, I am not dedicating my time in the gym to simply win a soccer game, I am doing it because by being resilient in this one situation, falling down and getting back up stronger than ever, and never ever letting defeat win is a life lesson I can use for years and years to come. Didn’t score my dream job? Cool, I’ll work harder to get the next one. Struggling to make rent? That’s okay, I’ll get another job. Resilience, though it does apply to soccer, is also an aspect I can take with me post-graduation.
Maybe I’ve matured or maybe I’ve just come to realize that my days on the field are quickly dwindling and my life ahead will no longer encapsulate a game I’ve never known life to be without, but either way, a new and greater perspective has helped ease the pain.
While I used to depict the lessons soccer has taught me as ones that would make me a stronger player, I now see those same lessons as areas of growth as a person.
While I used to work hard for the sole purpose of improving and winning, I now recognize that working hard is a trait valuable in all facets of my existence and that even life’s “scoreboard” doesn’t always represent the work put in.
While I used to be passionate and driven for outcome purposes, I now realize that being passionate and driven is the only way I should ever do any task in my life (and not for the result or reward, but for the love I truly have for what I am doing).
Sure, I knew these things before, but did I live them? No. The person I am and the growth I make as a human in these four years of college are much more important and valuable than any soccer player I could ever become and that, my friend, is thousands and thousands of dollars on higher education well-spent.
Although losing sucks and defeat is never easy, the lessons I have learned are ones that will stick with me throughout life, not just until our season-opener next fall.
So, the situation may be the same, but I, however, am not.